. . . .
. . .gosh. . .
. . .goodness gracious gosh! Gosh dang it to heck and back goodness, gracious me, powers that be! Heaven above, darkness below, WOW! This Fanfic was horrendous! Horrendous! The most horrible piece of. . .of. . .muck that I've ever read! I could rip into this piece of garbage so much that. . .that's exactly what I'm gonna do!
. . .goodness gracious gosh! Gosh dang it to heck and back goodness, gracious me, powers that be! Heaven above, darkness below, WOW! This Fanfic was horrendous! Horrendous! The most horrible piece of. . .of. . .muck that I've ever read! I could rip into this piece of garbage so much that. . .that's exactly what I'm gonna do!
This is“Gutterloo”
by jmj! (or Darthpinkamena on FanFiction.net)
This story. . .this
stupid story. . .this horrendous story. . .I mean, it's so sad! NO! It's beyond sad! I
mean, my gosh, what possessed this person to write something like
this? Look, you have no idea what a story like this can do to a
person! It reduced me to tears! Tears of sadness and rage! I could
rant about this for days, but I want to keep this quick, so let's
just hurry up and get on with, okay!
So were start with Scootlaoo, who is, as usual, an orphan. She lives in the street in a cardboard box, and is always filthy. Now, isn't that already kinda stupid. Scootaloo isn't dirty all the the time in the show!
Well, anyway, she comes into the school, and when Miss Cheerilee see how dirty she is, she suspends Scootaloo from school.
What the Hell?! I mean, she asks he why her parents don't clean her, and then gives her a suspension letter to give to her non-existent parents. Shouldn't Cheerilee go see the child's parents personally? Why is she just sending her away with a letter? It doesn't add up.
Oh, and did I mention ,“let the school bullies to their thing without intervening in any way”!?
That's right, the two spawns of Tirek, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, trying out a new name, "Gutterloo."
And wait, you'll never guess what happens next. Ponies spot the starving orphan stealing food, so Applejack and Rarity forbid Applebloom and Sweetie Belle from being friends with Scootaloo. I'm not joking, that actually happens.
It's Friendship is Magic for goodness sake! Shouldn't they be trying to talk with Scootaloo? Why is it like, "Oh! She's a thief! Screw her!" That's not how it works. And, come on, they're the Cutie Mark Crusaders! Why would they willingly split them up like this? The shop keepers who spotted her go ot Cheerilee for parental information, but since Cheerilee doesn't know, they give up!
That's right, they attempt to find out who her parents are, but give up instantly?! What the Hell!? They didn't even try!
So, you might think the fillies would try and stay in touch. Nope! Applebloom and Sweetie Belle actually go along with it and tell Scootaloo that they can't be her friend anymore! Does this author even watch this show?! I mean, the character are not acting right!
And on top of that, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon come across Scootaloo's cardboard box home, and they actually enjoy the fact that Scootaloo is homeless. Look, Diamond Tiara's a jerk, but. . .don't you think the author's going a little too far with this?
So, Scootaloo goes into Sugarcube corner to beg for food, and Pinkie Pie tries to help her, but gets stopped by Stallion Jerk of the Year, Mr. Cake. I mean, my gosh, he's terrible in this story! I mean, he threatens her with the Royal Guard? She hasn't even done anything yet! She just asks to taste some food, and he throws her out! He roars at her! Scootaloo ends up digging through garbage to find a box of moldy cupcakes! She even accidently bites a diaper- UGGGGGGHHHHHH!
Oh yeah, and Diamond Tiara destroys her box home and messes up her Rainbow Dash poster! That's adding insult to injury!
And Scootaloo eats the moldy cupcakes, throws up, has a nightmare- Is there a name for what's wrong with this writer?!
Luckily, because this is an orphan Scootaloo Fanfic, Rainbow Dash flies, rescues her, comforts her, hugs her, takes her in and adopts her. . ..
Or at least. . .it seems like that happens, only for it to end up being a dream Scootaloo has before she DIES!
That's right! Scootaloo dies dirty, filthy, friendless, and alone!
So were start with Scootlaoo, who is, as usual, an orphan. She lives in the street in a cardboard box, and is always filthy. Now, isn't that already kinda stupid. Scootaloo isn't dirty all the the time in the show!
Well, anyway, she comes into the school, and when Miss Cheerilee see how dirty she is, she suspends Scootaloo from school.
What the Hell?! I mean, she asks he why her parents don't clean her, and then gives her a suspension letter to give to her non-existent parents. Shouldn't Cheerilee go see the child's parents personally? Why is she just sending her away with a letter? It doesn't add up.
Oh, and did I mention ,“let the school bullies to their thing without intervening in any way”!?
That's right, the two spawns of Tirek, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, trying out a new name, "Gutterloo."
And wait, you'll never guess what happens next. Ponies spot the starving orphan stealing food, so Applejack and Rarity forbid Applebloom and Sweetie Belle from being friends with Scootaloo. I'm not joking, that actually happens.
It's Friendship is Magic for goodness sake! Shouldn't they be trying to talk with Scootaloo? Why is it like, "Oh! She's a thief! Screw her!" That's not how it works. And, come on, they're the Cutie Mark Crusaders! Why would they willingly split them up like this? The shop keepers who spotted her go ot Cheerilee for parental information, but since Cheerilee doesn't know, they give up!
That's right, they attempt to find out who her parents are, but give up instantly?! What the Hell!? They didn't even try!
So, you might think the fillies would try and stay in touch. Nope! Applebloom and Sweetie Belle actually go along with it and tell Scootaloo that they can't be her friend anymore! Does this author even watch this show?! I mean, the character are not acting right!
And on top of that, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon come across Scootaloo's cardboard box home, and they actually enjoy the fact that Scootaloo is homeless. Look, Diamond Tiara's a jerk, but. . .don't you think the author's going a little too far with this?
So, Scootaloo goes into Sugarcube corner to beg for food, and Pinkie Pie tries to help her, but gets stopped by Stallion Jerk of the Year, Mr. Cake. I mean, my gosh, he's terrible in this story! I mean, he threatens her with the Royal Guard? She hasn't even done anything yet! She just asks to taste some food, and he throws her out! He roars at her! Scootaloo ends up digging through garbage to find a box of moldy cupcakes! She even accidently bites a diaper- UGGGGGGHHHHHH!
Oh yeah, and Diamond Tiara destroys her box home and messes up her Rainbow Dash poster! That's adding insult to injury!
And Scootaloo eats the moldy cupcakes, throws up, has a nightmare- Is there a name for what's wrong with this writer?!
Luckily, because this is an orphan Scootaloo Fanfic, Rainbow Dash flies, rescues her, comforts her, hugs her, takes her in and adopts her. . ..
Or at least. . .it seems like that happens, only for it to end up being a dream Scootaloo has before she DIES!
That's right! Scootaloo dies dirty, filthy, friendless, and alone!
You can't do that, jmj!.
. .you can't! What are you a sadist?!
I
mean, look, I'll admit it. There are a whole lot
of Scootaloo Fanfics, and they all end with Rainbow Dash taking her in, and I understand that you want something different, but come on! You do realize that nearly everypony was out of character right? Sure, Pinkie was good, but you had Adolf Cake get rid of her!
You know why this story doesn't work? No one asked any questions! Think about it? That's something nopony every did!
Where do you life? Who are your parents? What do they look like? You seem to always be by yourself and no one has seen you house, care to explain that?
Why are you dirty? Buck it! You suspended from school!
Why are you stealing food? Buck it! You're not allowed to have friends anymore!
Are you begging for food? I don't care! Get out before I call the Military!
It's why they never knew anything about Scootaloo! And it's why she dies at the end! The characters would not behave like this! Cheerilee would investigate and keep asking questions until she got some answers! Applebloom and Sweetie Belle would meet secretly with Scootaloo and try to help her! Applejack, Rarity, and the rest of the freakin' Elements of Harmony would do their own detective work and investigating to find out what's up with Scootaloo! Mostly consisting of asking simple questions! And Mr. Cake, I like that guy. He has kids of his own. He's not a miser. He's a nice guy. Scootaloo isn't a criminal. She stole food, not gems or hundred of dollars. She didn't break into house, she just snitched some produce. You don't call the Army over a missing carrot!
And another thing, isn't it obvious that Scootaloo's an orphan! She's dirty, she's starving to death, she never talks about her parents; you don't have to be Sherlock Pones to get what's going on!
And again, the stuff that happens is depressing. It is so depressing. We go deep into Scootaloo's psyche as her life is being destroyed! This is heavy psychological stuff! Seriously, Scootaloo's suffering and death in this FiMfic is worse than what she goes through in Rainbow Factory.
I know I can't take that back, but I'm standing by it, Gutterloo is worse than Rainbow Factory!
Cupcakes was less depressing and emotionally scarring than this, in fact, this could really benefit from the dismembering of a certain pony who shall remain nameless *cough*diamondtiara*cough*.
All in all, this FiMfic is horrendous! Terribly awful. Well written, but makes no sense in characterization. A piece of muck! A D+!
